Vignettes 5 & 6

Vignette #5- Refusing to Eat
Molly was placed at a little over two years of age. About four months after Molly's placement, Mrs. Johnson took a weekend away with her mother. Mr. Johnson, an involved parents, stayed home with the children. The Johnson children happlily greeted their mother upon her return home. However, at lunch Molly refuses to pray with her family before eating, so is given a "time-out" consequence. She continues to refuse and, after an additional time-out, is given her lunch alone without the requirement of a prayer. She refuses to both eat and talk for the next three days.
Family A- consults their pediatrician, who advises fluids and patience. They decide to wait it out until Molly is ready to join the family mealtime routine again.
Family B- consults the internet and books to find out information about attachment disorders. Armed with this information, the Johnsons called their social worker who met with them and helped develop a plan manageable for the whole family. Molly's parents allow her to sit quietly while the family prays.
Family C- decides to stop giving attention to this behavior and Molly is given a normal meal portion. Slowly she began eating as much as she wants and even more slowly begins to talk. Several weeks later, Molly spontaneously began to pray with her family.

Vignette #6- Stealing
Mary is an eight year old wating child adopted from India. She had previously lived in two orphanages before placement with her adoptive family. Her adoptive rfamily consists of a mother, a father, and three biological children ages 15, 9, and 6. All were excited about adding Mary to their family. After being home a few months, they discovered she was stealing small things from the other children in the family. It became an increasingly difficult situation, as Mary's siblings began to resent her while her parents found that talking with her, explaining the difficulty, and praising her for being honest made little difference. They became more intense about solving this issue through talk and isolating her to "think about it." She made promises to stop, but didn't. They were concerned they couldn't take her to their friend's homes and worried about what future there would be for her at school and elsewhere.
Family A- relationship with her becomes more intensely focused on this issue and they become more distant emotionally from her, due to their lack of trust in her. they begin feeling like they can't help her and wonder why they aren't "good parents" for her, when they were for their biological children. Parents call their social worker for advice on how to parent differently for this child.
Family B- goes to the dollar store and buys many of the types of things she is stealing. They hide the items around the house when she is not present. When Mary returns home they encourage her to find all of the hidden items, and this becomes a favorite game they play. Mary loves the attention, and the siblings notice she is getting into their things less frequently.
Family C- When the parents "catch" Mary taking something, they chase her, yelling "stop thief" with great fanfare, corner her, tickle her, and wrestle playfully with her until the object is returned.